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Top Five Dick Moves by Steve Jobs

10.12.2011

Steve Jobs

I teach high school students, and when Steve Jobs passed away last week, all of them were devastated.

“Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg are like, gods,” one of my students assured me. “No, they’re like, amazing. We owe them everything.” A few of my students even changed their BBM thumbnails to screenshots of Apple.com’s now-ubiquitous homepage, and their BBM statuses to “RIP Steve Jobs.” When was the last time a CEO’s death made high school students thoroughly upset? Oh, right — it hasn’t happened ever, until now.

Anyways, I’m not trying to shit on a dude who just died a week ago, but did you know that Steve Jobs wasn’t actually that nice of a human? I’d rather not break my students’ big thumping hearts, but it’s true.  Here’s a list of the sketchiest things Steve Jobs did while he was alive!

1. When Jobs returned to Apple in 1997, he shut down all of the company’s philanthropic programs “temporarily”… but never reopened them.

2. Jobs had his daughter Lisa out of wedlock when he was 23 years old. and then, for two years, tried to deny he was the father, claiming he was both sterile and infertile.

3. “You’ve tarnished Apple’s reputation,” Jobs told an Apple team who had been working on updating MobileMe. “You should hate each other for having let each other down.”

4. Jobs banned the iPhone from downloading applications that feature gay art, gay travel guides, political cartoons, and other things considered “morally suspect.”

5. HE IS MEAN TO PEOPLE IN WHEELCHAIRS.  -Christina Drill

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  • aka47

    So your students are feeling sad about the passing of someone so you decided to look up some other blogs and list out the bad things this person may have done? Yes I say maybe because do we know the context or facts behind said list?

    Is this so absurd for you? I see people crying when a rock or movie star dies, why not a CEO? We are in a ‘era’ of celebrity CEOs. I mean if he wasn’t famous, would you post this for kicks? But hey, whatever drives traffic.
    You sound like an awesome teacher.

    • nathan

      i think you meant to post this in comments over at Gawker.

  • Christina

    Aka47 is so right. I’m a horrible teacher.

  • Ender

    yeah, often the big doers in human history arent very compassionate towards the masses, whom they consider (and i tend to agree) inferior. im a big steve jobs fan, but ive always felt like bill gates kinda saved the world from him. i dont think the 90′s would have happened at all the way it did if everyone had a perfectly stable OS.

  • aka47

    Whats the matter Nathan my comments to heavy for wittle bity Verbicide? I didn’t want to break Christina’s big thumping heart but it’s the truth. You missed out the Steve Jobs tribute piece so about a week later you’re trying to take him down a notch. Worst of all it’s just a ripoff of the other articles going around about Jobs’ dick moves. Money well spent Verbicide!

    Christina if you take put this much effort into teaching as you did in that ‘article’ then yes you are a horrible teacher.

    • nathan

      eh, you’re not all that clever. really i just don’t like trolls.

  • aka47

    Let me take a wild guess. If someone calls out a Verbicide writer you view that as trolling right?

    • nathan

      dunno. let’s do a test. take a look around your current surroundings. are you under a bridge? do you find yourself eating a lot of goat meat? do you have fangs? are your mom and dad trolls? if not, you’re probably not a troll. but you are probably kind of a dick.

      your therapist would probably agree with me.

  • Josh Diamond

    Any time a public figure dies, the public is free to judge the moral character or just about anything else about said figure. In my observation, the public and the media overwhelmingly took the side of Mr. Jobs. I found this to be coverage to be a refreshing break from what I had been hearing. 4 of the 5 points I was at least not fully aware of.

    As for Ms. Drill’s teachings, this wouldn’t be a bad subject to briefly talk about with your students. If it’s a Humanities-type subject you teach, talk about the perception of individuals in the media. Why do we favor some individuals in spite of their personal problems, and with others we cannot look past them? If it’s Pre-Calculus… better just stick to the lesson plan.

    And, aka47′s comments border on trolling, but I don’t think they completely cross that line. Mostly the tone was unhelpful for making your argument. The first reply has valid points, but I would have cut the last two sentences; they kind of derail the momentum and detract from the serious criticism.

  • http://www.pointsincase.com/columns/andrei-trostel/steve-jobs-was-dick chiangshih
  • Mike

    man Steve Jobs was an asshole he said that every single technological piece of hardware was copied from Apple I work at Sony and here we’re glad that he’s not working anymore we’re not glad he’s dead and that he died of cancer but yeah the tech world will be a better place without him I dunno if you notice that Apple would always start to attack other companies it was always Apple and Jobs who started this PC vs Mac fight I’m sure Microsoft and Samsung feel the same way
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